


Damn it, Rich!

by InNightSoRansomedRogue



Category: Blindspot (TV)
Genre: "The best eggs you've ever had!", Boston, F/F, Louis diner, Rich being a smartass, Sloooooow burn kinda, Zapatterson, aka Rich, and tasha n pats, fake dating au, jealous! tasha caused an Issue, soft gfs eventually, the blindspot LGBTs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-19 23:12:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13134195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InNightSoRansomedRogue/pseuds/InNightSoRansomedRogue
Summary: Patterson has an....undercover op of sorts. But this time, Tasha isn't happy about it, for one very important reason.





	Damn it, Rich!

**Author's Note:**

> Its officially December 25th as I'm posting this. So, here's a gay gift.

Patterson stared at her computer screen, currently occupied with images of Jane’s tattoos. She was trying to ignore the constant tapping coming from behind. The person on the desk over was none other than Rich Dotcom. Patterson still wasn’t sure how he’d wormed his way into working for the FBI. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know who he’d arranged some outrageous meeting with to get here. The first month of constantly having Rich around was infuriating. 

Of course, Rich was no stranger to the FBI, he was always showing up when the team least expected it, and always brought that huge ego with him. That took some getting used to.  
Now, ten months later, Patterson had grown accustomed to having her personal space invaded by the small man. She shared her lab and some of her techs with Rich, although she still keeps them in check if they appear to be having a little too much fun. His constant quips and jibes made the days a little more bearable. Today was not one of those days. Rich was still tapping incessantly, and it was driving her mad. 

“Rich. Seriously cut it out!” 

The tapping stopped. Accompanied by the sound of Rich sighing in frustration.

“Jeez. Someone’s a spoilsport” came the amused reply.

Patterson turned, shaking her head. “You know I can’t concentrate when you tap stuff like that”

Rich shrugged. “Okay, okay. Fine. I guess I was being a jerk.”

Turning back to face her computer screen, Patterson smiled. Rich was a jerk but he had also become one of her closest friends in such a short space of time.  
"You remember my Boston.. right?"

She groaned. 'Yes. I remember him. Actually, I think we formed a bond after we lobbed a dude over the head with whatever that thing he picked up was ' 

Rich snorted. 'Oh, I was so proud. And uh – it was a paint can. Anyway, that's not the point.'

Patterson focused on typing. The new tattoos were causing her a headache. 'So..the point is?'

Rich started to drum his fingers along the table top. He looked up at the screen.  
'Well, you see tattoo number twelve?'

'Yeah, I've been stumped on that. It might link to the one underneath, but that related to ShadowCat. I just, I can't see how it fits. It's not necessarily one that has to relate to the underlying details but it's the only thing I can think of.' She replied.

A pause.  
Rich was smirking. An expression that Patterson has learned meant trouble most of the time. Or stupidity. But with Rich, those things tended to be one and the same.  
'No. No! You can't be suggesting what I think you're suggesti-'

“Patty, just hear me out' He cut in.

Patterson groaned and cursed under her breath, but let him continue.

'This tattoo...it's an alias for a French artist. Not exactly my type of art. He's always drawing incredibly odd and abstract art deco style things. So boring.' He explained. 'You should probably Google him sometime. You know - to see what I'm talking about. Its really something to behold.' 

Patterson frowned. “You realise that you just called this guy boring and now you’re praising him?”

“I’m a man who likes to pick apart things of beauty. Or in this case, things that I can pretend I think are beautiful in order to sound more cultured. Or something.”

She shook her head, amused. “Alright, okay, quit talking about dumb obscure art for a second, and actually tell me what you came in here for.”

“Tattoo twelve. Notice anything here?” He asked.

Patterson was quiet. She began to look at where Rich was pointing, the tattoo now illuminated on the monitor. The stark patterns and distinct working reminding her of a case before. 

“See it? The three parallel lines are a code. Three lines for three individual artist ID’s” Rich stated. 

“Except. They’re all the same guy. Three paintings, same dude. French artist with three paintings, same guy but let me guess, he uses different names for each painting, right?”

He nodded in agreement. “Totally. Except his literal only known alias is Three” 

Patterson smiled “Hey, this guy might actually be the only other person in the universe with a worse name than DotCom.” 

Rich pretended to flinch at her verbal attack on his naming decisions. “At least people outside of my workplace actually know my first name. And besides which name do you hate more? Gord, or Boston?” 

She opened her mouth to reply but Rich continued.  
“Did I mention he’s coming in to help on this tattoo?” 

She didn’t answer.

'What are you doing with your face?' Rich asked

'I'm grimacing!”

Rich pulled a face. “Oh please, you two even seemed to get along, you literally just said that”

Patterson sighed. “Yeah but the less time I spend around Boston, the better. He’s irritating. And besides, I didn’t actually think you were seriously implying that we might need his help on this. I thought it was more a hypothetical scenario. Please tell me you haven’t already pitched this to Kurt” 

There was no response, instead Rich was just smirking.  
Patterson’s voice getting louder with each word, she stepped forward. “Rich. I don’t like that smile. What does that mean?”

“My dear Boston might just be on his way here. He’s maybe...quite possible, almost definitely - on a flight here right now. And He’s going to see our pretty faces” He said, pointing to his face. “in less than three hours.” She threw her hands in the air in annoyance. “Oh my god, Rich! Did you ask Kurt? And he agreed? Seriously, what did you put in his drink.”

Rich only chuckled. “Oh and uh, one more thing. I maybe told a tiny weenie lie that you and I were dating so…you’re sort of going to have to go along with it until he leaves because I want to make him jealous. I need to win back his heart! He broke mine! Almost 3 and a half times to be exact. Or, was that me that broke his? I don’t remember. He is the Dobby to my Sock, after all.” 

She was shocked. “You told him what?! Rich, What the hell!” she exclaimed. 

The anger in her voice clearly made Rich paused for a second. He held his hands up defensively. “Okay, I appreciate that last part was a little out of line, but seriously? You’re gonna stand in the way of love? Come on, it’s only for a couple of days.”

Almost three hours later, sat in her lab, Patterson realised that she had spent far too long trying to figure out a way to sort out this mess. Apparently, Rich had set this plan in motion almost two weeks ago. He’d told everyone that they were dating. Everyone except from her. Patterson thought back to some of the strange looks she’d gotten, some of her techs had been a little more chatty than usual, and now she knew why. 

Even Tasha had suggested to her only last week that she knew something was going on. Patterson had blatantly dismissed it because she wasn’t “in” on this whole plan, which made her current situation all the more infuriating and terrible. Great, Thanks Rich. 

Patterson was so deep in her thoughts that the sudden voice that greeted her made her shoot up in shock.

‘Hey there Agent Granny Panties!' 

That voice. Patterson knew that voice. The annoyingly likeable Boston Arliss Crab.

Oh man. It’d been three hours. He was here already and she was still fretting about how to handle this stupid scenario. She turned. And there he was. Wearing his trademark business style shirt, and that strange hairstyle. She groaned. 

'Okay, first of all, dude. I'm not an agent any more. Second of all, I am no way old enough to be somebody's grandma. So like, neither of those titles work'

Boston leant on the SIOC doors. 'Oh! I get it. You went rogue after you and your lady parted ways' 

Patterson scoffed. 'My..what? My Lady?!'

He raised an eyebrow and waggled his finger around to emphasise his point. 'Yeah. What’s her name? Uh, Suzy, uh, begins with... an S or something like that? Real scary looking. Stinger? Something?' 

Patterson frowned. 'Who ar-'  
She was cut off by a sudden shuffling coming from the office opposite. And then. 

'Tasha Zapata. CIA chick. Catch up Boston, we're six best friends here, and well, ....you' 

Rich dotcom. 

Boston's expression became irritated. He looked at the other man with a scowl. 

“I still can't believe you got yourself into a place like this. The bureau?! They must be even more unreliable than I remembered.” 

Patterson sighed. “Hey! That’s hardly fair.”  
Boston only ignored her, and went back to talking to rich.

“You left without saying goodbye. Left me in Prison. With Caleb! You remember Caleb, don’t you?”

Patterson and Rich exchanged a look. Rich rolled his eyes whilst Boston continued rambling.

Although, Boston clocked the pair’s annoyance straight away. His eyebrows rose in surprise. 

“Wait, Oh, hold on...is there genuinely something going on between you two, was that a look? I saw that! Gord Enver, I had my doubts. But I see that these naughty rumours are true, Patterson, you’ve got to take care of him. You see, I really couldn’t believe that you and Rich were together, like in an official capacity. But then I remembered how he left me for a woman once before too.”

Rich shook his head. “In my defence, she was a very beautiful and very wealthy woman. You even said you liked her dress! I thought that was approval or a sign for me to go ahead, you know?” 

Boston only made a sound of disgust before turning away and heading towards Kurt’s office, muttering about being needed for a briefing, waving goodbye to Patterson as he did so.

 

Just then, Tasha emerged from the other side of the room, she’d been talking to Keaton about something, which Patterson had only noticed at the last minute. She smiled at Patterson, but that smile soon faded when she saw Rich stood next to her. “Hey, Patterson can I talk to you for a sec?” She asked. 

Patterson nodded, and then headed towards the hallway. Tasha quickly followed and fell in step beside her. 

“So, I’ve been meaning to ask..” Tasha trailed off. “You and Rich? I mean I’ve sort of known forever and when Rich told me the other week I just-“

“Wait, Rich told you?!” Patterson asked, a little too quickly. 

Tasha looked uncomfortable at how Patterson had reacted. Before she could respond, Patterson continued. “Oh we’re not uh… I mean we don’t actually make a big, uh, thing…about it, it’s just not really...”

Tasha laughed, Patterson not being able to form sentences was obviously amusing to her. “No, it’s okay I mean you don’t have to explain. I get it you’re keeping a lid on it...He likes you. You like him.” There was a hint of sadness in her tone. 

Patterson let out a breath in frustration. She couldn’t exactly blow their “cover” and Tasha didn’t want to listen, her face was drawn in a stern glare.

Patterson shifted uncomfortably. The silence was awful.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that, Patterson?!”

Tasha’s tone was one Patterson had never heard before. She sounded angry, but there was something else to it. 

“Fine. Forget it. Maybe I just want to see you genuinely happy for a change! But are you really sure that this the right choice for you?” 

Patterson was stuck. She didn’t know what to say. She needed Boston’s help for this case, but he wouldn’t help them if Rich and Patterson weren’t actually together. And what hurt her the most was the fact that Tasha, actually seemed like she was upset. 

 

It was late. Patterson had left the lab as soon as she could. She was now sat in Lious’ Diner. She needed some time to be alone. Her cup of coffee had long gone cold, and was sat discarded on the table in front of her. 

She recalled the conversation between them earlier. She had felt something. But Tasha had felt something else entirely.

Obviously they were close. Well, closer than close. They were best friends. Patterson had come to her over the years with…everything. 

She’d visited her late at night when the nightmares had gotten too bad, when she couldn’t sleep. When she couldn’t stay awake because she was afraid that if she was, she’d notice a bug in her ceiling, Or her lamp. Or in her mouth. It was stupid, but Tasha hadn’t judged her, she only listened. And she’d helped her through some of her darkest days. 

And in that moment she knew. She loved Tasha. And, Tasha loved her too. 

She looked at her watch. 7:28pm. It’d been three hours since she’d seen Tasha. So she picked up the phone, and took a steadying breath. 

She dialled Tasha’s number. And the phone rang.

And rang.

And it rang. 

And it rang.

And then, 

“Oh. Hey, Patterson.”

Tasha’s voice. Patterson smiled.

“Hey, I….uh. I’m at louis. 21st street. Uh… I’m working late and could do with some company. You wanna join me?” She asked, although keeping her voice steady, trying to hide her nerves.  
There was a pause.

“Sure. I’m on my way now.”

Patterson’s face formed into a smile. She just had to wait until Tasha got here. And she couldn’t come soon enough. 

So she waited, and ordered another coffee. She drank it slowly, taking her time. And it was just as she was finishing her second cup that she saw her. Tasha. 

She waved, and walked over to Patterson’s table.  
“Hey.” She greeted. She set down her bag on the floor, took off her coat and placed it on the back of her chair. 

“Hey yourself.” Patterson shot back. 

Tasha frowned. “You’re uh…You said you were working?”

“Oh yeah, I” She scrambled for words. “I uh… my-“

“Patterson. Where’s your laptop?” She smirked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well…” she rubbed her neck awkwardly. “Whew, okay. Uh.”

Tasha just looked increasingly confused at the lack of explanation that she was giving. 

“I didn’t ask you here because I wanted company with work” She said.  
Tasha looked mildly offended. “Oh so you don’t want me here with you? Ouch, Patterson.” She laughed.   
“No, no! I mean I do want you here, just not for help with that.”  
“Okay, so, what did you want?”  
Patterson put her hand on the table. She sighed, and didn’t meet Tasha’s gaze.  
“I called you because I wanted to apologise. About…earlier.”  
“No that’s alright, I mean if anyone should apologize, its me.”  
Patterson threw up her hands in protest, “No, Tasha, can you just…hear me out. Please. I was thinking, earlier. About what you said. How you reacted. And uh…how I reacted. And I’m sorry. But, I’ve been doing some thinking and I…”   
“You what, Patterson?” Tasha asked, appearing annoyed.   
Patterson slammed her hands down on the table.  
“Damn it Tasha! I’m in love with you!” she shouted.   
Silence. Just like that. She’d blown it.   
Tash was quiet. And then she laughed. A beautiful, adorable, wholesome laugh. “Patterson”

Patterson held her head in her hands. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I don-“  
“Patterson”  
She looked into her eyes, meeting her stare.  
And so, Tasha reached over the table, and stroked Patterson’s cheek.  
And then, she kissed her. Slowly. Gently. Softly.  
And she knew. She knew. 

 

The End.


End file.
